Common Lisp
Common Lisp is the mysterious programming language born from endlessly copying an ancient grimoire of parenthetical incantations by prankish ancestors. It stubbornly refuses to evolve, sneering at the latest tech trends, yet survives by inexplicable perseverance. Its high syntactic freedom imprisons developers in a hell of parentheses, leaving enlightenment as the only escape. Through infinite REPL meditation sessions, we endure our own ascetic madness.